working hard for the money

so, tonight marks the first complete week at work. so far, i actually REALLY like it. it's SO different from the other restaurant i was working at (in the best possible way!!). first of all, it's a cafe. although there is a full dinner menu, in true cafe fashion, the majority of customers just get coffees and sit around chatting. in the states this would probably drive me crazy, since your wage is tip oriented and thus the mentality is "turn and burn." but since australia's wages are much, much higher.... i don't care if someone sips their latte for two hours. in fact, i love it! sometimes it gets quite busy, but during the downtime i just chat with the regulars. i talk about myself a lot, and who doesn't love that? actually, some people get annoyed with having the same conversation over and over. (you know, the whole "where are you from, what are you doing here, how long have you been here, what did you do back home..." etc, etc). i quite enjoy it though. you never know what kind of connections you are potentially making.

that being said, this next week should prove interesting. there is a day staff and a night staff, and i've been working nights. for whatever reason, the day staff is all girls and the night staff is all guys. admittedly, it's much easier to win over guys than girls. and i'm pretty sure the girls (who have all been working there for a while) are going to boss me around and frustrate me to no end. the few times that i've come in around 4 (which is the interim period between day and night shifts), and had to work with the girls for a couple hours.... well.... let's just say it's not the same. they always call me "darling," and whether they're doing it intentionally or not, it comes off as really condescending. it's almost like they think if they tack on "darling" at the beginning or end of the sentence, it excuses the fact that they are bossing me around as if they're my superior.

however, i love the general manager. he's really nice and very accommodating. so if this week sucks major big time, i'll simply tell him i don't want to work mornings unless they really need me. i think he's planning for me to be on nights anyhow.

christmas was nothing special. i worked christmas eve and christmas day, which was fine with me because the weather was crap this week and holiday wages are simply awesome. i did come home christmas eve to my roommate and her friends still partying the night away. we polished off wine till the sun came up, and even though it sounds lame it was actually really fun.
lastly, i have NYE off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm pretty excited about that. i still don't know what i'm doing, but the girls are apparently planning something. should be good. i have to work the next morning at 9 AM though. killer. bottom line: i will be very hungover and every one's going to have to deal. alrighty. gotta get my beauty sleep. early start tomorrow.

toodles!

happy holidays!

so right now i'm watching the music videos on the special features part of the movie dirty dancing. it's a monday night, my roommates are both gone, and i can't sleep. after watching paranormal activity, my nights are a bit restless. i just can't get that last scene out of my head! (shudder).

anyhow, i have a new job. i'm working at a little cafe/restaurant in an area called double bay. i start tomorrow! after slightly panicking, i got offered three jobs in a matter of four days! i'm just glad it's all sorted. i need to start earning money again, stat! i'm supposed to go to asia in february, up the east coast in march, and then asia again in april/may! can't wait to start traveling again, but until then, i have to work my BUTT off!

also, i started going to the gym again. i've been almost every day for the past two weeks. and i lost 16% of my body fat in that short amount of time. isn't that amazing?? i almost think it was a mistake... but it brought a smile to my face nevertheless. all those times i thought i was about to pass out from running so hard on the treadmill is actually doing something! wahoo! i would say that i want to look fabulous for NYE, but i have no plans!! most of my friends will probably be working... and no one bought tickets anywhere... i'm just hoping someone will have a house party. it's going to be hard to top the past couple new years (miami, london...). i'm not trying to stress it, because i'm sure sydney will be epic.

not much more to report on. i got kind of burned by a guy that i was semi-not-really-but-sort-of interested in. basically, i went out with him monday and found out he had a date with a friend of mine friday. oh well. these things happen. i must say, that while i've been dissapointed on several occassions, it's fun having little crushes here and there. i'd rather keep meeting loads of people, regardless of whether it pans out, opposed to not meeting anyone of consequence at all.

a bit random, but dude.... brittany murphy died?!?! crazy. i liked her. no matter how many movies she did though, she'll always be "ty" in clueless. EPIC! i still remember this little yellow plaid skirt i had when i was 11, complete with knee highs, that i bought in an effort to actually become alicia silverstone.

to everyone i know -- merry christmas and happy new year! i'll be celebrating my orphan christmas on the beach with friends, cocktails, and live music. bummer, huh?
xx

sydney to byron

well, after five solid days of surfing, surfing, surfing... it looks like i may have to put my pipeline dreams on hold. bottom line: it's fricking hard!!!!!!!! not that i thought i would just pop right up and catch a 20 foot wave.... well.... maybe 10 feet? haha. anyhow, surf camp was amazing. a bit like drill camp with the 5:30 am starts, but i have to admit, that was when the surf was the best! i really liked everyone in my group. i was especially close to a canadian girl, emily. we palled around the majority of the time.

all the instructors were seriously adorable. typical surfer types -- blonde, tan, ripped. we had a "lesson" every day, but really, aside from day 1... they pretty much just toss you to the waves and let you learn through trial by error. witness the slow progression of me standing:

it was sooo tiring. i told my instructor that now i know why surfers are so fit!! half the battle was getting over the freaking waves!!! and while they may not seem big from the shore, when you are out there paddling your little heart out, they may as well be tsunami waves. i probably swallowed 1,000 gallons of salt water over the course of five days. normally the days went a little something like this: wake up and surf, eat breakfast, surf, eat lunch, surf, eat dinner, drink around a bonfire, sleep, repeat.

we traveled to a remote little town called crescent head (so gorgeous!) and another little town called arrawarra. i ended up going skydiving at arrawarra!! i'm going to try and figure out how to upload the video. it's really cool :) the experience was amazing. i've been wanting to go... and at arrawarra you can land on the very beach we were surfing at, so emily and i decided to sign up!

finally, we ended up in byron bay. i seriously fell in love with byron. it was the cutest, most laid back little town. it was pretty crowded because right now it's what australians call "schoolies," (i.e. summer vacation), so there were a ton of teeny boppers in town. that aside.... the hostel i stayed at, arts factory lodge, was seriously the coolest hostel i've ever been to. also, my friend tom (we worked together in sydney) was staying there. i got to spend some time with him and his friends, who were also really cool/fun, which was nice. i missed him! we always have these great little heart to hearts. i have so much to write about byron, that i don't even know where to start! i won't bore everyone with the details. suffice it to say that i'm only staying in sydney until new years, and then i'm definitely leaving! this little mini-break reminded me of how much i love traveling.... how many awesome new people there are to meet.... and how sydney is only a small part of what oz has to offer! OH. i also went cliff diving. new moon style (which i saw and loved!). just outside of byron there was a place called the quarry. i jumped off a 70 foot cliff into the water. crazy huh? that was honestly WAY scarier than the skydive. i was the only girl to do the jump though. all the guys were pretty impressed, which i can't deny made me feel like a bit of a rockstar. and lastly, i got a hair wrap. it's so cute -- and so byron style. i haven't had one since i was like 12, but i love it! all the girls from my room got one as well. one of them is actually in sydney this week, so we are going to get together at some point.

well, i'm back in sydney. *sigh.* back on the job hunt. *double sigh.* my friend claire is back in town though after having worked in perth the past few months. i haven't quite sorted the details, but i think she is going to take my roommates' room while they are in brazil for the holidays. i hope it works out, because it would be nice to have someone to chill with around bondi. (sabrina always works days and i typically work nights so there are weeks where we barely see each other!)

i'm going to a thanksgiving dinner tonight. it seems as though a bunch of people are going, so it should be nice. i'm in charge of dessert. i was going to attempt to bake, but i think i'll just buy some dessert instead. haha.
things i'm thankful for this year:
1. my amazing family who support all my hopes and adventures.
2. australia! quite possibly the best year of my life.
3. the fact that things just get better and better.
4. all the amazing new friends i've made lately (both in the peace corps and in oz)
5. my continued optimism in regard to love and relationships. it's shocking how cynical people are.
6. the beach. i find such clarity around the water and sun.
7. good music. enough said.

much love! xo

let's go surfin now, everybody's learnin how...

you know that scene in charlie's angels where demi moore is on the beach, running out of the water, carrying a surfboard under her arm? well, soon that will be me -- cool surf chick. i finally signed up for a surf camp!! i'm soooo excited. surf camp is basically like a package of surf lessons, but we also travel to different beaches and have social activities. the trip is from sydney to a town called byron bay. byron is supposed to be amazingly gorgeous (if not very touristy). my friend tom is living there right now, so i'm going to stay a few days extra in byron bay and hang out with him. there's also a town 30 minutes from byron called nimbin. i am dying to go there. it's supposed to be this uber cool, chill, hippie town. definitely going to make a little day trip.

other than that, not much is going on. this is my last week at my restaurant job. the working visa has a restriction that doesn't allow people to work for an employer for longer than six months. and my six months are up!! hallelujah! it's a little bittersweet though. i will NOT miss that job. the managers were assholes and the job itself was mind numbing at best. but i love all my co-workers. they're my best friends here.... so i hope i'm not completely out of the loop when i don't work there anymore :P i haven't even started looking for other jobs yet, which is probably not the best thing. but i am going to hand out resumes either tomorrow or the next day for sure. i had such an easy time finding a job the first time around, so i'm hoping i'll be just as lucky now.

it's 75-80 degrees every day now. sometimes i just walk down the street thinking, "i live here.....!!" it's a nice feeling.

feeling good, feeling great

the other week i think i had a small anxiety attack. i wrote a long email to my mother, whinging about feelings of doubt and uncertainty. part of me still feels the need to have a plan... the need to settle... the need to "grow up." although i am very much enjoying my time abroad, for some reason i have this looming fear that i'm going to wake up one day and be living in my parents house at age 30 with nothing to show but some photos, fun memories, and stamps in a passport. i know, i know... these are all amazing experiences... blah blah blah. let me emphasize the fact that i in no way, shape, or form want to trade places with anyone in monroe, ga..... but having some sort of plan for the future would be a little reassuring.

while i can't say that i've completely shaken these feelings of.... well, self-administered pressure, i can say that today i had such a great day and i'm back on cloud 9!

today was a good day at work (for once). it was labour day today... and holiday pay is extremely lucrative. i basically made in one day what i usually make in a week. happy times! plus, it was dead and everyone was just so relaxed. (again, for once). during my break, i had coffee with emily and monica, my two aussie friends. i really love those girls. it was so nice to just sit and chat and be a girl! i haven't had a pleasant, genuine conversation like that in a while.

also, i've been getting to know another girl from work, jess. she's british and so funny. i honestly kind of overlooked her at first... i'm not sure why... but we went to a co-worker's birthday party together after work one night and had such a great time. we have plans to go out this wednesday and considering the fact that we are meeting around 5 for happy hour and continuing from there.... well, it should prove to be yet another "sydney night."

OH, i'm supposed to go rock climbing tomorrow!? my roomie was invited to be a part of some "rock climbing group" that was formed by her co-workers. i feel like i will probably end up embarrassing myself terribly... but i would love to give it a go anyhow. AND i'm finally going to sign up for that surf camp tomorrow!! i will post on that as soon as i do. i was debating between surf camp and fiji (long story short, a friend invited me to join her on her trip), but fiji is pretty expensive when it's all said and done and i have a lot of other things i want to do. like learn to surf!! i'm determined to be a badass surfer chick! if it's the last thing i do!

um....... also going to sign up for a pottery class tomorrow. i need to start filling my days with creative and/or sporty activities. the other reason i was feeling a tad down last week was because it seemed as though i was coming to a standstill in sydney... not really doing anything different than i would be if i were back in the states. can't have that!

ok. i think that's about it. i actually took my camera out the other day so i could start photographing cool stuff... but of course, it wasn't charged. *sigh.

love yall!

buses and bogans

i generally work about five days per week. since i live in bondi now, but still work in the city, commute by bus is more or less a part of my daily life. normally, i really don't mind. i'm so used to it at this point, and even if i wasn't, i have no other options...

anyhow, sometimes, people kill me. there are unspoken bus etiquette rules!

tonight was a classic example of what NOT to do. some burly australian man in a footy jersey sat next to me on the bus. i always hope i get the seat to myself, but sometimes the bus is full and this is obviously not an option. tonight however, there were several other open seats... so why would you feel the need to squeeze your wide frame into the fairly small space next to me? then, he decided to start cleaning his teeth with a toothpick... and he was really scraping. i mean, reaching waaay back into the dark corners of his mouth. BARF.

on the bright side, i got my butt kicked today at the gym. yes, this is a good thing. it means that while i am extremely out of shape, i'm on the road to fitness! i would love to be skinny again, but i really want to be in shape too. i mean, i'm in my prime right now! i've been really motivated about going. maybe because it's almost all guys at the gym i go to... no one noteworthy, but i still love it. i can't lie, i kind of feel like a badass lifting weights next to a bunch of dudes.

hmm... guess that's about it. planning a surf trip next month. i'll post something when it's more concrete.

bondi girl

so after being inundated with facebook messages and emails i suppose it is time to blog again.

for those who don't know, i have moved! i live on the beach now!! it's seriously awesome. i LOVE being so close to the water. i've always wanted to live on the beach. that being said, the move has kept me busy, busy, busy. first of all, i had to take care of a lot of stuff in my room. the mattress was hard as a rock, so i had to buy a new one. then i had to buy sheets and things of that nature. secondly, the internet came into play. my roommate has a modem in his room and pays month to month. i figured, i would buy a wireless router and then we could all split the internet bill. but the router thing just isn't working out. they're always unplugging one of the wires, and for some reason my roommate's computer won't connect to the network, so it totally defeats having wireless. i would try to figure out a solution, but i can't be bothered. the bottom line is that the modem is in HIS room. so anytime there is a problem, he either has to be home (and awake) or leave his door unlocked so that i can fix it. it's just waaay too much of a hassle. and it makes my internet connection completely unreliable! also, i have a problem with my power cord. right before i left for australia, my computer slid off the couch and fell on the ground... on the side the power cord was on. now every time i plug it in to charge, the computer doesn't recognize/sense the cord. either i bent the cord or something inside the computer... let's hope it was the cord. either way i have to buy a new one, or at least look into it. before, i could kind of jiggle the cord and it would work, but now it's getting to the point where it's completely impossible and unresponsive.

SO, with all that being said.... you can see why blogging, skyping, emailing, etc has been a bit of hassle! not to mention that i have so many outlets to check online!! i have to check my UGA email, then hotmail, then facebook, then my blog. it can prove a bit exhausting. especially when it's 12:00 in the afternoon on a gorgeous day, you have resumes to start passing out, internet things to take care of, surf lessons to inquire about, birthdays to celebrate, going away parties to attend, and work six days a week!!

back to me moving. i am living in north bondi, (pronounced bond-eye). it's a 25 minute bus ride (via the express bus) to the city. not too bad, but unless i'm working, i probably won't be going into the city all that much anymore. all my old roommates have officially gone. it's so sad! i really will miss them....
and so i introduce the new roommates. i have to be honest when i say, not quite as awesome as the old. but the location is fabulous and i have my own room. (i should note that most people share rooms because it's so hard to find a reasonably priced apartment!) and did i mention it's a three minute walk from the beach?!
i live with two brazilian guys and a german girl. i have mentioned the german girl, sabrina, before. we were house hunting a month or so ago with some other people from work. long story short, the other people dropped out so that left me and sabrina. i think that definitely worked out for the best though. i really do love sabrina. she's so cute and funny. and sometimes i think she's sooo laid-back... which she is... but on the surface it seems like she doesn't care about anything. meaning, she's cool with everyone and nothing really bothers her. but in actuality, she's just like me! haha. she gets annoyed about the same things and we tend to have the same habits. the two brazilian guys: diego and diego (how funny is that?) are ok. diego 1 (we call him diego 1 because we met him first) seems normal. he goes to school and plays soccer. he's a bit of a womanizer though and is always bragging about his latest conquest. like i care! diego 2 is funny... but i would probably never be friends with him outside of this situation. he's on a student visa so he has to go to school, but i honestly don't know how he passes anything because i never see him do any work. he does construction... and he's that kind of person.... typical construction guy. rough around the edges, you know? the only real problem is that they listen to old school rap ALL THE TIME. and at like, full volume. it's sooooooooooo annoying. even if i liked the music, which i don't, i would be like... SHUT UP! i guess i haven't really said anything because 1) i just moved in, 2) i want to pick my battles, and 3) i'm actually hardly ever home. i'm usually home during the day when everyone else is gone and by the time i get home from work, everyone is asleep! i like it that way though.

what else... there are probably a million things i could say, but it doesn't seem relevant. you know how so much can go on in your life, but unless you talk to people on a day to day basis, those little details don't come to mind... or just don't seem worth mentioning because you have to know my normal routine and situation to really appreciate the story. i will say that work is much better. i actually almost like one of the bosses now, vicki. the longer you are there, the less shit they give you. eventually they bother you less and less and actually start trusting you to do what is an extremely simple job that really doesn't require constant direction and supervision! with that being said, i am going to start looking for jobs around bondi. i hate having to make the commute. it's at least $10/week for the bus pass and by the time i walk to the bus stop, take the bus, and walk to work, it's about an hour journey. and that's if i take the express bus... after midnight the express doesn't run anymore and the bus ride is more like 45 minutes. plus, i really want to start waiting tables. you make so much more money that way. and with summer/tourist season right around the corner... i really need to cash in on that market! speaking of work... the latest escapades with my co-workers and i celebrating tom's (to my left) birthday at wallaby bar is pictured below:

lastly, i've met some cool australian people the past couple weeks. up until recently i've been befriending mostly other foreigners. but my restaurant has been hiring a lot of aussies lately, and two of the girls, emily and monica, are really cool. actually, almost everyone has been warming up lately. i guess you just have to give people a chance to let their guard down sometimes.

all for now. love you!
xo

indecision 09

i'm about to go to bed, but all these thoughts are swirling around in my head... i must put them down! it would be so much more "romantic" if i was actually putting pen to paper. perhaps i should get a journal... but then if i was always writing in my journal, i would never do the whole blog thing. as fergie would say, i'm so 3008. but back to the point.

what should i do?!

so the whole moving to bondi beach thing didn't exactly work out. sabrina and i are supposed to be looking at apartments together, but i'm a little nervous to move in with just her, b/c well... her finances are not exactly in check. she's always kind of "getting by," and i'm much more responsible than that. i know my mom is probably laughing/rolling her eyes. but when push comes to shove, i know what needs to be done.

the other day claire mentioned to me that she and meghan were going to travel up the west coast soon. (*claire and meghan are my american neighbors). she invited me to go and at first i took it lightly thinking, sure maybe... but probably not. then i got to thinking.... why not?!?! as of right now i have absolutely no one to travel with. perrin and sarah are gone. they've been replaced by two spanish guys, who i'm sure are perfectly nice, but i've spoken about 4 words to in the past two days. phillip and james will soon follow... returning to the states and england, respectively. now if claire and meghan go... where will that leave me? alone, that's where! it's so exhausting trying to make friends all the time. i like meeting new people and everything, but at the end of the day i would like to have one reliable precense in my life. someone who will just go to the grocery store with me and pick up some ramen. as of right now, that just doesn't seem like a possibility. and as i write this i can just see my mother squirming in her chair/bed.... "hillsong people are reliable!!!!!"

the point being, i didn't come to australia to get drunk every night and work at a stupid restaurant. pretty sure i did that from 2003-2007. it was called the university of georgia. the more and more i think about it, the more and more i think i should just throw caution to the wind and go!

so what's holding me back?
1. money
2. i like living in the city and being familiar with the surroundings. i feel like a "local" and that's how i want to spend my time here. as a local, not a tourist.
3. i wanted to have a sydney base for if/when anyone visited. although, who am i kidding? no one's going to come. i barely even keep in touch with anyone. i don't mean that in an ugly way, it's just the reality of the situation. the majority of my friends from back home are just not as adventurous as i am. something like australia would be a passing thought and nothing more. far from a goal (and budgeting -- don't make me laugh).

reasons to go:
1. claire and meghan are cool.
2. i want to visit the west coast and now is the perfect time to go. (it's dry season and in a couple months it will be the wet season, i.e. nightmare)
3. i love sydney, but who knows... maybe i will love another city more.. perth or darwin for example.

but mainly it's the money thing. i've spent quite a bit since i've been here. but i also have managed to tuck away some of what i've made. i guess the thing is, if i take the trip... i'll have enough to go... but i'll come back to approximately $0. and that's if i budget...

it's not that i don't want to travel at all. in fact, it's one of my top priorities. but i wanted to have a nice chunk of change before i did anything. i mean, i've only been working for a month and a half. i was planning on working till december before i really started to travel. i figured i would ring in the new year in sydney and then.... anywhere/anything!

i really like claire and meghan though and not that i wont make any more friends while i'm here, but they would be really great to travel with.....

decisions, decisions! in truth, i'm still kind of waiting on claire to give me more details about the whole thing. right now, it's marinating. but i talked to one of my co-workers, dan, (quite possibly my favorite person there) and he's been all around australia. from darwin to cairns to melbourne, and more. he thinks it's absurd that people never leave sydney. and perhaps he's right. the more i talked to him, the more convinced i was that i should go.

this is getting long and quite tedious. it's mainly for my own sake, i suppose now everyone knows the inner workings of my over-analyzing, slightly cautious, wistful (albeit timid), mind!
run now!

insert clever remark here.

normally i try to think of a clever little title. something witty. but today it's late, and i just can't. oh well.

anyhow, nothing new to report, really. just living and loving down under. i'm still trying to find a second job which is proving quite difficult. i went on another nanny interview the other day. i honestly thought I had the job because she sent me an email after the fact saying she was interested and asked me how much i was charging. i responded with what i thought was an average wage and added that it was negotiable. that was on thursday and i still haven't heard back :P i'm getting a little frustrated, because I want to make more money!! (talk to me harry winston. tell me all about it.) no worries, though. it will all sort itself out, i'm sure. everything else has!

so i mentioned a while back that i was moving to the beach soon with some co-workers. it didn't quite work as intended. one of the guys keeps flip-flopping. and the other girl and guy are somewhat of an item now... so the two of them being roommates is not exactly kosher (especially in the guy's eyes). either way, it kind of fell apart. but i love my little german, sabrina. so we are going to look for an apartment together and forget the guys. i'm a little bummed b/c i thought living with the boys would be fun... but no worries. i'm not in a rush to move. come august i might be though... all my roomies will be gone, gone, gone.

i went to the blue mountains with sarah and perrin sunday. it was sooo gorgeous. our tour guide was ridiculous. he told us his life story. (and i care, why???). then he would just ramble on and on about retarded stuff. exhibit a: he discussed the birthing process of kangaroos, complete with a lecture on the placenta. no lie. but it was nice to actually do something outside of the city. not that i don't love sydney... i do!! but sometimes i forget that there is a whole world outside of the CBD. [that's aussie lingo for city based district for all you NON-locals :)] i definitely need to do more stuff like that. i'm dying to go to the outback. some people have said it's lame and there is nothing to do, but when you think of australia, you think of the outback! it's next on my list for sure.

----pictures to come soon----

met another american today. he works with me. from NY. i thought about shantay and how she'll be home soon...
anyhow, he seemed pretty cool. but he told me that he had all these travel plans and basically canceled them all last minute because he met his current girlfriend. GAG. i hope he doesn't regret that major decision...

and speaking of work, i have five shifts next week. that's the most i've gotten to date. the money will be nice... but the actual work itself will not :P just gotta stick it out until summer rolls around, and then i'll be hittin up jobs in bondi!

lastly. phillip keeps meeting people... and when i say people, i mean people he's romantically interested in... and i'm jealous. why can't i meet a cool guy to pal around with? i mean, he's leaving in three weeks, so his relationships are fickle at best. so not fair. and it's not just him. the majority of people i meet have a significant other. it's not that i want something super serious... in fact that's the last thing i want. it's hard to verbalise, but basically i just want someone who i can watch a movie with, go the museum with, etc. and kiss goodnight. if i see him, cool, if i don't, cool. nothing more, nothing less. is that so much to ask?! i think not. alas, destiny feels that it's not the season. my path to self-discovery is a solitary one indeed.

oh wait, one more thing. i'm thinking about going to spain in the summer. i haven't forgotten about Vicky Cristina Barcelona, and my need to follow in the footsteps of Scarlett Johanson's character (minus the whole love triangle thing). Note to self: Must learn spanish by May of next year. totally doable.

all for now. hope everyone's soaking up the sun (but not before applying SPF 30)!
much love*

birthdays and brits

so i'm officially old. 24!! it seems like such a big number. i remember being 10 and thinking the teen girls were soooo cool. and then i remember being a teenager in high school and thinking the senior girls were IT. and then i remember being 18 in college, and the baby at work, and thinking 21 seemed light years away....

now here i am -- 24!! 24 is a hop, skip, and a jump away from 25. and 25 is dangerously close to 30! all i can think is... holy crap, i'm almost 30! haha. most of the people i have come into contact with so far on my journey have been younger, averaging 21. they have plenty of time to meander around and do whatever. personally, i feel a bit like i'm in limbo. most people my age have "real jobs," are married, have kids, etc, etc. i'm still wrestling with the idea that eventually i have to join them and build my own little white picket fence. but then i remind myself that there are no rules. i'm happy living life! meeting people, seeing places, experiencing different cultures... i can't imagine doing anything else anytime soon. i just have to figure out how to sustain myself whilst taking part in these adventures....

anyway, i would rather keep these blogs light and fluffy. since that's how i feel these days... airy... breezy... relaxed! a few new things:
1. we have new roommates. luke, sarah, and perrin are officially moved out. two scottish girls moved into sarah and perrin's room (the FL girls). their names are hannah and becky. they arrived on wednesday and went out with us for my birthday. they seem really sweet. although.... philip claims that becky rolled her eyes when philip and i were chatting in the living room. i didn't see it... but he seems convinced she was annoyed with our chatter. hhmm. hopefully he was mistaken, b/c we all had a great time on my bday!

2. my birthday was cool. very chill, but fun. we went to a couple different bars, including the very exclusive/very trendy "Ivy." it was mostly suits and other business-types. definitely expensive, definitely pretentious.... moving on! we met up with some of philip's co-workers. LOVE THEM! they're all british and fun and hilarious. especially this one kid, mike. i pretty much adore him. he's sooo precious. like a little teddy bear. he came out for my bday, and apparently it's his birthday next week. i asked him how old he'd be.....
his reply?
20. *sigh*
he's still one of my faves though.
sadly, i did not take ONE picture on my bday. i guess it's kind of the same reason i haven't really taken any pics around australia. i'm too busy living life... can't be bothered with stopping and trying to document everything. but i will try to be slightly more conscientious. i know everyone wants to see my memories in the making :)

OH, and i just have to note that i got some of the most random birthday wishes via facebook! like... people i haven't spoken to in years and years (from high school and earlier). it was nice, but random.

ok. all for now.
love you all!

rollercoaster

where to start. well, things turned around SO quickly from my last blog. it's funny because i was all bummed about everyone leaving and then, quite literally, the next day i was offered to go apartment hunting with some people from work! a guy and girl (tom and sabrina) were talking about how the hostels they are staying in are bogus, so i mentioned that they should check out my place. they thanked me for the offer, but said they were looking at places in bondi beach. then, they offered for me to move in as well! i was sooo excited!! so it's me, tom (from the UK), sabrina (from germany), and glenn (from belgium). they are some of my favorite people at work, so i was pretty pumped. plus that totally took me out of my mini-funk. i originally wanted to live on the beach when i decided to come to sydney. i swear, it's like everything has been working out and i don't even have to try!

in other news, i met two new americans -- and i'm a fan. they are sisters: claire and meghan. meghan just popped by our house one day (she lives next door), and introduced herself. she mentioned that she was going to an irish pub and invited everyone to go. all my roommates were tired and we had plans to go out the next night (i'll mention THAT fiasco of a night in just a moment). but i'm always up for meeting new people, and i loved the last irish boy i met... so i figured, why not? i'm only young once! so we went to this pub... and seriously, we were the ONLY non-irish people there! it was crazy. let me just tell you, the irish are not intimidated by anything. they will approach you with the confidence of a supermodel. and as soon as you mention you're american, they'll fall all over you. it's great :) haha. i loved both of the girls, and we made plans to go out again this weekend!

SO, let me just tell you about last night. *sigh* never in my life have i experienced such ridiculousness amongst grown men and women. so we made plans about a week ago to go out monday night because aubrey, my sharemate/roommate, is leaving this week. so we planned a sending off party. the night started off fine. we made tacos and were just hanging out. then the tequila came out.....

people are doing shots of tequila. and more shots of bacardi. and more shots of vodka. and more shots of malibu.....
and drinking beer. and drinking wine.

i knew it was going to get ugly. let me just take the time to mention that i'm really not a big drinker. i like going out and having drinks, and i'm not trying to sound high and mighty or anything... but i really don't need alcohol to have a good time. i order drinks that taste good... not drinks that will get me wasted.... and i drink them at a normal pace.... i don't chug. with that being said, by the time we left the first bar, i was horribly bored. i wear my heart on my sleeve, so it was fairly obvious that was i over it by about midnight. however, i've been out with drunk people and a little bored plenty of times before, so i wasn't stressing it. back to the story... we leave the second bar (to go to a third) and all of a sudden shit hits the fan. two of the roommates are arguing and the situation is NOT getting resolved, another roommate is drunk and doesn't know what's going on, another roommate is placating to some dude he works with so he can't be bothered by the rest of the group....

i can't even begin to describe the horror of trying to keep together a group of 7 drunk people who are starting to turn into angry drunks. again, NEVER in my life have i been soooooooooo annoyed. i was literally to the point of tears, i was just so angry!! it was cold out, i was stone sober, one of the roommates literally ran away and was essentially making people chase after her. AHHH! i don't do drama. especially not with a bunch of immature youngsters who can't control themselves when they're drinking.

anyway, suffice it to say... that it's going to take me a minute to get over that one. i did not recieve an apology this morning from ONE person for the way they behaved or the things that they said. i knew i wouldn't. and while i don't hold grudges, i expect things to be resolved... i don't just make nice like nothing ever happened. i would hate for something so silly to taint my experience with some of the roommates, but i'm ready for them to go. or for me to go. at least that's how i feel at the moment.

i guess things can't always be perfect!! haha.

oh my... as i'm writing this blog... someone just apologized! i feel a little better. i don't want to go out anymore with people who don't know their limits, but i'm glad that they had the manners and sense to do the right thing. look at that. it works out after all...

too good to be true

so tonight i'm a little bummed. i knew that most of my roommates would be leaving fairly soon (mid-july to mid-august). but as it turns out, half (or more?) are leaving in a week!! my roommate, aubrey, hasn't been very successful in finding a job (but bear in mind that she has only been here two weeks), so she has decided to go home early -- this wednesday to be precise, because it's too expensive to stay. then tonight, the florida girls (who i have grown to love) are leaving a week from sunday. luke, from ohio, also decided just today that he too will be leaving earlier than planned, or in about a week. aubrey will be going directly to the states, where as the florida girls and luke will be traveling for a couple weeks and then returning to the US. BUT, philip was planning on travelling with luke.... so.... maybe he is leaving too?! that would leave me, james (the brit), and the two french girls in the house.

it's quite sad. as much as i would love to travel with them, i really can't right now. i mean, what would i do with my stuff? i don't want to pay rent here AND take off work AND spend money travelling. at least, not this soon. and i can't take off a week or more from work already..... my manager is a jerk, and i really don't think he'd give me the time off, even if i dared to ask. so.... yeah....

like i said, i knew this time would come, but i just wasn't expecting it to be so sudden. and most importantly... everyone will miss my birthday!!! my 23rd birthday was epically tragic.... it consisted of me, alone in my apartment in bulgaria with popcorn, chocolate, and a movie. at the time it wasn't a big deal... i was actually still excited to be in BG... but this year i'm in sydney and i wanted to go all out. i had a theme planned and everything! and we had this whole BBQ shindig planned for the fourth of july.... complete with watermelon, hotdogs, jello shots, fireworks.... the whole package!

*sigh. i feel as though this is the only problem living in the share house. people will be coming and going quite frequently. and now i'm all worried. what if i hate my new roommates. i feel like i lucked out this time around. i know, i know... the majority of the people traveling - in theory - are "like me." (as in like-minded, similar goals, experiences, etc.) but i can't help but feel anxious!

anyhow, i suppose not all is lost. on a happier note, i really do like my coworkers! i went out again with them for a "quick drink" after work on wednesday, and next thing you know... i walk in the door at 4am! the picture is of us from sunday night. conveniently, this is the majority of my favorites. (from left to right: front row - tom, allistair, glenn. next row - sabrina, me, ariane, jeremy. back row - melanie's bf, melanie, zelani, petra, norman)

just dance

so i deleted my last post... i feel a bit ridiculous for posting it... but i was SO upset at the time. ah well, live and learn!

onto more important and happy things.
well.... kind of happy.

the good news: i had a BLAST sunday night. i went out with all my co-workers... and true to restaurant-fashion, they're crazy! but crazy in a party-all-night way. we started off at a rooftop bar. loved the place! it was super chill and you would never know it was there! definitely a local spot. cheap drinks, chill vibe, nice views. after that, we went to king's cross. i've been dying to go there! we went to two different places: world bar and moulin rouge. the first place closed shortly after we arrived, so we moved on to moulin rouge. i would say moulin rouge was a new experience for me. i danced my ass off for about 4 hours. i was dripping sweat by the time we left. they played pretty intense techno/trance, which is not normally my style, but everyone was just having such a good time. it was contagious! plus, people here don't grind on each other like they do back home which is sooooo refreshing. i can just dance around and not have to worry about being harrassed by various sketchballs. i shared a cab home with one of the guys from work. (his name is allistair -- possibly the coolest name ever!). apparently he lives a block away from me! we're practically neighbors! i was excited about that. he was cool and super nice. he paid for the taxi, which i thought was very gentlemanly of him. it's the small gestures that make a big impression. plus, i'm always looking for new people to hang out with.

the bad news: i lost my phone. it really sucks because it's a prepaid so now all my contacts are gone and i have to buy a new one. and they're kind of expensive considering how crappy they are. i don't know how i lost it! i remember having it with me at the first bar... and i swear i put it in my purse before we went to kings cross!! but apparently, not. i've called it a few times... but no one answered. and i checked back with the bars... also to no avail. *sigh* i'll have to be more careful next time i suppose.

OH, and today i got asked for directions!!!!!!!!! how cool is that? not only did i get asked, but i actually knew how to direct the person to their desired location. i'm SUCH a local. :)

the weather is back to gorgeous. i think i'll take a ferry out to one of the islands tomorrow. such is the life of leisure.

confessions of a shopaholic

greetings everyone! wow i'm in a good mood. the other day i reread all of my blogs from bulgaria. yikes! was i in a perpetually bad mood or what?! unlike lovely australia, where every day is a holiday. truly!

although, i am slightly dreading a very long weekend at work. oh well. i am actually looking at some part-time nanny/babysitting jobs. again, it's not the most ideal work, but the hours and pay are amazing! it's just too good of an opportunity. if i could babysit two, three days a week and work at the restaurant on the weekends... i'll bank. with my visa restrictions (did i mention this already?), i'm kind of limited to what type of work i can do... so i've decided i'll do whatever, simply as a means to an end. right now i feel like i'm making enough money to cover basic living expenses and then either 1) save for traveling or 2) spend going out and attending various activities/festivals around sydney. i want both!! i want to be able to save AND go out with my roommates... not just to bars, but movies, dinners, concerts, etc.

not to mention the fact that i want to take surf lessons, cooking classes, dance classes, photography classes, japanese language classes.....

and it all adds up! i have actually looked into all of the above things. surf lessons at manly beach -- they have an excellent weekend package. i'm simply waiting for a bit, because i don't want to request a weekend off from the restaurant when i've only had four shifts! cooking classes are available everywhere! they are SO expensive, but there is a free one that i found online yesterday and am going to sign up for. hopefully i can get one of the dates scheduled for the end of the month.... they are apparently very in demand (obviously). there is a dance studio right down the street. a bellydancing course JUST started last week. i'm bummed i missed it. but they have a casual/drop-in hip-hop class on thursdays that i'm DYING to try. i wanted to go last night, but it was my roommate's birthday and the house had plans. i'll start this week for sure. finally, i found a local school that has casual courses, specifically for people who want to try something new. the photography and language classes already started back in may... but they end this month. so i'm going to call and hopefully a new course will be starting in july!

last night we had another roomie birthday. one of the florida girls, perrin, turned 22. i feel that i should mention that i really like them now. not that i didn't like them before, but.... you know how sometimes it takes a minute for girls to bond. by the way, did i mention that we have a new roommate? we do. aubrey from LA. she's cool. she's gone out with us already. she does a lot on her own during the day though. it's a full house for sure. (but fun!)

it's turning cold here. yesterday it was in the 40's. apparently it's like, record lows! of course they would have the coldest winter when I got here!! but it's just a cold front, so i'm thinking it will pass and we'll carry on with pleasant weather. i did, however, purchase a black pea coat. on my quest for said coat.... and believe me, it was a quest... i stumbled into a department store called "myers." it was like walking through the pearly gates. rows upon rows of the most gorgeous dresses, tops, and jackets i have ever seen!!!!!! of course everything was completely out of my price range, but i have made up my mind that i will own at least one dress from that store! if i get the babysitting job i want, i'll be able to do it!

well, i was just about to upload some pics... but... i can't seem to find my camera cord!! *sigh* i will go through everything more thoroughly later. i really hope i didn't forget it. anyhow here is a pic of me and some of the roomies. this was for british james's bday. from left to right we have james, aubrey, sarah, perrin, and then philip in the back. ♥♥♥

working hard for the money

ok, so things are moving along quite nicely. i found an apartment the first week i was here... and i found a job by day 8! i have to say that i am quite impressed with myself.... about the job thing that is. it takes most people at least two weeks, if not a month, to find work. i got hired at the first place i walked into! granted, IEP (the organization who helped with my visa) suggested i go there... but still! i'm giving myself a cookie no matter what.

that being said... my new job. i'd say i pretty much hate it already. i'm working at a place called Jordon's International Seafood. (yeah, yeah, i'm jordan working at jordon's -- how original).anyway, i'm more or less a version of a cocktail waitress. all i do is run drinks all night. and maybe set the tables. you'd think it'd be easy. what's not to like, right? but the restaurant is some upscale joint on the harbour. and they act like everything is a life or death matter!! the wine levels have to be JUST SO. the logo on the tea cups have to line up with the logo on the saucer, the wine glasses have to form a perfect square on the tables. it's just so ridiculous!! i can't stand it. i feel like if i make one mistake, i'm going to get fired. and the managers are SUCH assholes. why can't people be polite and pleasant? especially when it's some one's first day! i mean, i wore earrings yesterday.... and it's not like i was wearing giant gold hoops or something... and the manager said i needed to take them off. "we're working not going to a disco." (that's a direct quote). or i told the other manager (the GM) that i had all my paper work ready (copies of my visa and passport, other necessary documents), and he asked "why are you still talking and not presenting them to me." um, my freaking bad! but it's really good money, actually. and at least i have a job. i am thankful for that. i'll just continue the hunt and as soon as i find something else, i'm totally done with that place!! i will say that i really like the people who work there though. there's a variety of people there. (surprisingly i'm the only american!). one of the british guys teases me all the time.. it's always, "say this, say that." i don't mind. i'll forever think southerners are the most charming :)

although.... i met an irish guy when i went out with my friends the other night. talk about charming. *sigh.* too bad he's only in sydney for a week. he was soooo cute. he sounded just like gerard butler in "p.s. i love you." i mean, could you not just die?! dublin, ireland anyone? haha. but really....

it's no big deal though, because i already met my future husband. i went to church the other sunday and stayed after for a little bible study group. the guy who was leading it was truly handsome. and it was at church, so he was just so sweet and genuine. and i actually loved his accent. it wasn't too over the top -- some australian accents are! he will be mine. oh yes, he will be mine.

so it's british james's birthday this weekend. did i mention he's turning 19?!?! frick i'm old! he doesn't act 18 though... maybe it's the british thing. plus, i love him. he's just precious. sadly, i will be missing out on the first half of the festivities because i'm working. they're all going to a house party at james's australian friend's house. hopefully by the time i get off work and get ready to go out, they'll all be back at a bar in sydney. i really want to go to king's cross. it's supposedly the "red light" district of sydney... i'm not sure if they meant that literally or not... but it's where all the club are. apparently, it's one of those things where you should be weary, but at the same time you have to experience it at least once! but i'll be in a big group... with guys... so i'm not worried about it. it's going to be so sad when all my roommates leave! they're all like, students, so they're leaving around august. it would be super clutch if lindsey was here by then... but we shall see.

i think that's all for now. i promise i will start taking and uploading pictures soon. now that i have everything sorted, i can feel free to explore the city more and do some touristy things!
hope you all have a lovely weekend.
xx (the british way cause i'm so posh like that)

Part II: the real world: sydney

"This is the story of eight strangers...living in a house...when people stop being polite, and start getting real..."

I ♥ my roomies!! I was really nervous about meeting everyone, but it went exceedingly well. The only thing is that they are all really young... (19/20) and it makes me feel horribly old. Whatever. Here's a rundown of the roomies (in the order I met them):

1: Phillip from Louisiana. He helped me with my bags, so he automatically gets a star in my book. He went to LSU so there's a little in-house rivalry. He seems really cool, and we've already had a few laughs. I think we'll end up being good friends.

2. James from the UK. I mean, he's British. Enough said. But seriously, he has the scenester look going on with his little skinny jeans and converses. Super cute. He's actually really funny... without trying to be.

3&4: Two girls from Florida. They were a bit cold at first in typical girl fashion, but I think they are warming up a little. Some of James's friends came over to the house last night and everyone kicked back and had a good time. They're only here for two months. They're spending the summer (well, American summer) in Australia and then going back to FL for school. I haven't really made my mind up about them. I think they'll be fine as roommates, but not life long friends or anything.

5: Luke from Ohio. One word: adorable. He has gorgeous eyes and the sweetest smile. Did I mention he's 18? Or maybe 19. Either way, he's a child. He seems very genuine though and easy going. Makes me wish I was in high school again.

6&7: Two French girls. One of them is actually Chinese, but she's fluent in French. I'm not sure if she was born and raised in France as well or what... both of them are kind of hard to understand. Their English is so/so and their accents are pretty heavy. They're really quiet, but sweet. I think they understand most of what you are saying. Kind of like me with Bulgarian. You understand a lot more than you can speak!

That's the rundown of who's in the house. It's extremely reminiscent of the MTV show "The Real World." I told Phillip this and he said he was thinking the same thing. We were joking about making a confession booth somewhere in the house! haha. Anyway, I think I'm really going to enjoy my time here. As far as jobs go, I'm going to start door-knocking on Monday, resume in tow. I'll probably just get a hospitality type job. I really didn't want to do that, but I have come to realize that with the restrictions I have on my visa, any serious kind of work is not really an option. I'm totally fine with that though. I just want to make as much money as possible and spend it on more travelling and other extracurriculars.. like dance classes, surf classes, etc. Plus a restaurant job is really flexible, and it will be an easy way to meet people.

I think that's about all for now... plus, I'm tired of writing. I will make sure to keep updating regularly and hopefully catch ya'll on Skype from time to time!
xx

Part I: the nitty gritty

Ok! So now that I have a semi-permanent residence and free internet, I feel like I can finally write a proper blog! Where to start?! I suppose the trip to LA first and foremost.. the beginning of my journey.

So, I spent two days in LA before I went to Sydney. My friend Jennie, a friend from work/college, was nice enough to let me crash with her (since I purchased my ticket from LA to Sydney and bought my own connecting flight from Atlanta). I loved LA!!! Ironically, she wasn't too thrilled with the city and is actually considering moving back to Atlanta. I understood where she was coming from though when she told me why. I didn't have a lot of time there. My flight from Atlanta was canceled on Thursday, so I ended up getting there Friday afternoon. (I have the WORST luck with flights :P). But we went to her friend's apartment... apparently the same building where Kristen Cavillari and Tommy Hilfiger's son live... and chilled at the pool. Then we went out for one of her friend's bday's to a dive bar in Playa Del Ray. Saturday we went to Santa Monica (my fav area of all we saw) and had lunch, walked around, etc. It was nice and relaxing.

Saturday night I checked into the airport. My flight was scheduled to leave at 10:30, but was delayed for an hour. (told you i have the worst luck with flights...). The flight itself was ok. A bit turbulent in the beginning actually. Totally full flight -- blah. (One day I WILL be able to afford first class and have one of those little cocoons!!) The food was horrible, but I expected no less and had adequate snacks. I watched "He's Just Not That Into You." Sooooo good!!!!! Definitely in my top 10! Then I started to watch Twilight (*Robert Pattinson*Sigh*), but I was getting drowsy and dozed off. I was pretty much in and out of sleep for the majority of the trip. I had a window seat, so I propped myself against the window and somehow managed to get a little rest. I woke up at one point though and REALLY had to use the restroom... but the other two women on my row were sleeping and I felt bad waking them up. I mean, I know how hard it is to fall asleep in the first place... so I just held it..... for a realllllly long time. Other than that, the 14 hours went by quicker than I thought it would! By the time I looked at the "flight path" on the little tv screen, we only had 2 1/2 more hours!

I got to the hostel around 9:00am. I was rooming with a British Girl, Si Si, and a Korean girl. I forgot her name. She woke up at 7:00 every morning and did not come back to the room until 9 or so that night, upon which she promptly went to bed! haha. She was sweet though. I loved Si Si. Like Amanda said, there's just some kind of chemistry between me and the Brits. I swear, my destiny is in London!! Moving on... there was a German girl in our room for two days and she was quite strange and annoying. That's all I will say about that. The hostel itself wasn't bad, but it wasn't that cheap. Plus, I have soooo much stuff that it made me nervous to know that it was sitting in the room just waiting for someone to take it!! I had a lot of really nice clothes, jewlery, shoes, computer stuff... everything!! And sadly, you just can't trust people these days. So I was really ready to move out and really feeling the pressure/stress of finding a decent, affordable place!!

On Wednesday, I had my orientation with BUNAC, the company I applied for the visa through. The girl who lead orientation was really nice and really Australian, but in a totally endearing way. I was kind of hoping to meet a few more people... but there was only one other Canadian girl and she was with a friend. It made me a little sad actually, because I really wish Lindsey was here. It was a lot harder to say goodbye this time around. I think I mentioned that already, but what I can. She is my life partner, after all.

*SIDE NOTE: at my friend's bachelorette party, a girl asked if Lindsey and I were friends and I said "yes, more like life partners." I didn't even think about it... well apparently, the girl thought Lindsey and I were lesbians for the rest of the evening. HA. oops!*

Anyway, BUNAC referred me to this housing agency, Sleeping With the Enemy. (cute, huh?). I made an appointment to see the place and was immediately sold. It's a share home, so I'll be sharing a room with another person, which I did NOT want to do at all. But, housing prices here are insane and I don't have a job yet... so my options are a bit limited at the moment. Plus, the house is soooo cute and brand new! They just renovated and opened it 3 weeks ago.

Ok, now I'm going to break the blog into two parts, b/c I have SO much to say about the house, and this will just get ridiculously long!

dizzy

everyone wants to know what's going on. i'm busy people!!! i'm living in a hostel, trying to find an apartment, trying to meet people, trying to find a job, trying to get my bearings, getting a cell, setting up a bank account, filing my tax number, etc, etc, etc.

i have so much going on... i'll update when i can. the big city is overwhelming and really freaking hard to conquer. i'm safe and sound, just going about things like a chicken with my head cut off.

sydney in a nutshell: diverse with amazing weather. 70 degrees in the "winter?" yup, i'll take it. oh, and every girl wears leggings like they're pants.... really not a good choice for most people. but i'm thinking (or hoping) the trend will fade soon.
xo

australia's for lovers

just had to point out the fact that i am 17 short days from SYDNEY, AUSTRALIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i'm just so excited. i have no clue where i'm going live... and i have no job prospects, but that's the best part! i'm just going to walk off the plane and figure it all out upon arrival. it's like in a movie or something. (which totally proves my point that things in movies really can/do happen in real life!)

anyhow, i'm crazy busy till i leave. bachelorette party, florida trip, concerts, and then packinggggggggg. we all know how daunting of a task that can be. but i think i have learned from my bulgaria experience to be honest with myself (as far as what i will actually wear and what i'm bringing "just in case i meet prince william" <-- an exaggeration but you get the point). and let's keep it real. i LOVE to shop... and sydney isn't going to be lacking clothes, shoes, and more. so i'm going to try and keep the suitcases light.

also, this might be kind of morbid, but an old friend of mine passed away saturday. he was 24. even though i hadn't seen him in a while, we still kept in touch via facebook and such. not to sound completely cliche, but it just made me think about how you never know when it could all end... and how important it is to live life to the fullest! which is exactly what i intend on doing♥

but i will miss my bestie and soulmate: L. i mean... come on.. how cute are we??

breathe a sigh of relief

so i haven't really had much to say as of late. i'm just kinda "hanging out" these days. working at my dad's office a few hours a day... picking up the occassional shift at outback... dreaming of Australia always. speaking of the land down under, i know people have been curious as to how that is going. well i applied for my visa, but since i was in bulgaria for more than three months i have to have a chest x ray to test for tuberculosis. bulgaria is a considered a "high risk" country for TB, according to the australian government. i was slightly annoyed b/c i feel like i had a shot for something every month i was in bulgaria... not to mention the fact that i JUST got tested for TB before i came home. but it's whatever. i'll walk through fire to get out of monroe at this point! i have a doctor's appointment this monday, so hopefully after that i'll be just a hop, skip, and a jump away from a year of fabulousness in sydney!

i can't wait to explore my options when i get there... photography classes, cooking classes, and anything having to do with the water and marine life! the other day i read the newspaper for sydney university and it was seriously one of the funniest college publications i've ever seen in my life. i really want to look into school there as well...

which brings me to my next thought. i've been reading my friends' blogs from back in bulgaria, and i always try to think of encouraging words... but i can't! that place sucks pretty hardcore. personally, when i was there most of my good times were centered outside of school and/or with the other volunteers. i'm just so glad things played out the way they did. i'm so happy right now. i swear, nothing can bring me down. i love being home, and i love looking forward to my next adventure. i think if i had finished the two years it would be the opposite. i would be so bitter, i would be a different person. i actually have a very sunny disposition, but sadly it was often overshadowed by my constant frustration, lonliness, and dissapointment.

i think what made my departure so different was that i had already had serious thoughts about leaving early. and i had a plan if i did decide to leave early. not only that, but i was there for almost a year. i think other volunteers who leave early have regrets because they realize they didn't give the situation a fair chance (i.e. left too soon) or they came back to absolutely nothing (no job, house, etc.) and didn't really know where to start.

i guess what i'm trying to say is that you should do what makes you happy. i'm glad i did.

PS. i know ya'll saw my britney pics. it was AWESOME!!!! next up... lily allen. she won't have a show like britney's, but her songs hi-larious. if you haven't heard "not fair." please listen to it: http://music.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=music.artistalbums&artistid=12283261&ap=0&albumid=10643612

top chef

this blog is for shantay. she's a hater and doesn't believe in my new master chef capabilities. PROOF YO!

my meal last night:

first we have delicious tuscan mushrooms (and yes, i took out the stems and stuffed them myself)

next we have tasty bruschetta. mmmmmm.

what we have here are herb encrusted chicken tenders. enfused with the flavors of parsley, rosemary, and thyme.

and finally, the table as a whole. complete with white wine, of course. yum!

days turn into nights... nights into days

so i'm sorry to report that there is nothing to report! i am officially home and officially settled in.
- get car insurance again: check
- get new phone plan: check
- talk to friends and tell them the story: check
- accept multiple wedding invites (*sigh*): check
- get job: check
- finish australia visa application: ongoing

i am back in the states and totally at peace with it. i thought i would go through a fairly lengthy period of bulgaria withdrawals and nostalgia, but it's safe to say it was more or less a passing thought and i'm over it. i do miss my friends terribly, though. but i know i will see them again. thanks to modern technology and applications like facebook, myspace, and skype, it's so easy to keep in touch with people. plus, when the volunteers return from bulgaria (around the same time i will be returning from australia) i will have connections across the country!!

i've also been keeping in touch with several of my students on skype. some of those kids truly amaze me with their skills. just the SPEED at which they can type... never mind the outstanding accuracy... is mind-blowing. i hope they continue to seriously study english throughout high school. they have such potential!! i do miss those students... the motivated ones who were sweet, behaved, and made my job fun from time to time.

so to clarify, in case i haven't yet already, my thoughts are as follows: bulgaria the country, or as a whole - whatevs. the people in bulgaria that i formed relationships with - cherish, love, and miss them bunches!

anyhow, i'm working at my dad's office right now. it's a pretty sweet gig honestly. i just answer phones and do some secretarial work (filing, faxing, etc). everyone at the office is nice, and it's a really laid-back atmosphere. right now i'm eating chips and salsa that someone brought back from lunch and listening to a cool new broadband radio station i found through iTunes. not too shabby. later today i'm going to stop by Outback, the restaurant i used to work at, and talk to my old boss. i just want to pick up some weekend shifts maybe and make a little extra money. he's a good guy and always treated me well, so i'm sure it will work out just fine.

life is a little slow perhaps, but very pleasant. my mom and i have been getting along, which is nice. we had one small argument but it was quickly resolved, and i'm happy to report that it's been mostly smooth sailing. OH, i can't believe i didn't mention it before!! i'm officially a master chef!!! i've been wanting to start learning how to cook for a minute. this might sound silly, but i want to be fairly "domestic" when i get married one day. i don't want everything to be fast food or frozen food. plus, i actually really enjoy cooking. it's very therapeutic.... chopping, measuring, stirring....

so i've made mexican lasagna (success), a tomato basil pasta dish with a spring salad (mild success), and a fabulous seared tuna with a mango salsa. the presentation alone was adorable, i can't even lie. my mom even took a picture of it. maybe i can post the pic somehow... we shall see.

lastly, on the australia front, i will hopefully be mailing my forms in tomorrow. i just have to get my boss to fill out my recommendation form today and then pick up my college transcripts real quick. done and done! i even printed everything out for lindsey. loves her... but she needs a little push. or maybe a big one. i'll keep ya'll posted on the process and my estimated departure day.

there's not much to blog about in the states, but i'm thinking maybe i'll pick it back up when i arrive in the land down under.

all for now.
xo

bittersweet symphony

so i was going to wait to write this blog until i got home... but i'm sitting here at the peace corps office with absolutely nothing to do and a lot on my mind. as you all know (or will know after you read this) i have been "administratively separated" from the peace corps. i traveled to istanbul without permission for the weekend and was caught. now that i think about it... i should have known i was going to get caught... i'm pretty much the worst liar/criminal in history. i remember the days in high school when "you're grounded" was a phrase well known to me. whether it was sneaking out, drinking, or whatever underhanded thing i tried to do... i always got busted!

with that being said, i knew the potential consequences of my actions, and yet i decided to go to istanbul anyway. (*side note: the way they counted my vaction days was whack). now i can't exactly say that i regret going-- i had a freaking fantastic time-- but i can't say that i'm especially pleased with the outcome. of course, i wasn't planning on getting caught. i didn't want to go home in the middle of the year like a punk. but truth be told, when i initially found out i was being sent home... i was almost a little relieved. i had been seriously thinking about whether i could handle teaching some of these kids for another year and a half, and i had been contemplating leaving this summer. so at first, i almost felt okay, because peace corps essentially made the decision for me.

the relief quickly subsided when i started having to say goodbye. it was a lot harder than i thought it would be. the reaction of various friends, colleauges, and students was so overwhelmingly touching that for the first time ever, i actually felt like bulgaria was home. my students started a petition for me to stay and some of them actually called the peace corps office! i mean, i know that some of kids are cool with me... but i've said it before and i'll say it again, you truly never know who you are impacting or how much you are affecting them. when i went to the school on tuesday, my assistant director started crying, then my counterpart started crying, and then even some of the kids started crying.... it was very emotional. and i guess i just wasn't expecting it. again, not that i thought people would just throw up a peace sign and walk away... but i wasn't expecting such a warm, genuine, tearful farewell either.

so now i'm kind of caught in between..... between feeling guilty for leaving mid-year and sad about leaving people behind and being excited to embrace everything wonderful that is America. i'm lucky to have such great, supportive friends back home. they don't really care what the reason for me coming home is... they're just super pumped i'll be back! but like i told alex... it's so very bittersweet.

it's funny because now that the pressure is off, i look back and think 10 months wasn't so long.... and the students weren't so bad. of course just last week i was cursing the entire student body for their terrible behavior and wondering how on earth i was going to get through february and march with absolutely no break. i mention this because i hope it is slightly inspirational to the other volunteers. when you finish your service, you'll know that some days you barely survived, but you'll forget that feeling of exasperation. i have often contemplated how it is that RPCV's come back all chipper and willing to share their "fantastic" experiences. now i know. after it's all said and done, you tend to forget the bad parts and focus on the accomplishments.

as a matter of fact, there are actually some things i will miss about bulgaria.
1. shantay, amanda, and alex. they are surely friends for life and will be at my wedding. (then maybe i'll make believers out of them that weddings are fun and true love exists!)
2. lazy sundays and having so much free time
3. the good, sweet students
4. sofia and sugar
5. not really having to worry about what i looked like on a daily basis b/c there was no one to impress
6. joking in bulgarian... i can't tell anyone back home "stiga be."
7. getting packages and snail mail. people underestimate the power of a good letter.
8. how cheap everything is
9. having europe at the tip of my fingers

things i will not miss.
1. FLEAS
2. the neverending pile of dirty dishes to be handwashed
3. hanging my clothes out to dry
4. let's just say modern appliances in general
5. the bad, obnoxious students
6. not knowing what's going on half the time and language barriers
7. public transportation and having my schedule dictated by said transportation
8. the general lack of options... clothes, food, entertainment, etc.
9. the customer service and overall lack of politeness
10. being alone so much

i'll probably post a few follow up blogs about returning home and what's going on, and then that will be the end of my blog experiment. i wish all the other volunteers the best of luck and success this year and the next.
xo

a spoonful of sugar

so i just wanted to write a quick word about my latest escapades. on a side note: the word "escapades" is fun, isn't it? it reminds me of that old janet jackson song. also, i changed my profile layout. the other one looked too washed out, and i thought it was a bit hard to read.

anyhow, i went to a club called "sugar" in sofia this past weekend. they actually played rap and hip-hop... a miracle! usually the options are bulgarian music, bulgarian music, bulgarian music, or crappy techno. (and when i say crappy techno, i'm referring to the quality of the selection, not the genre itself). anyhow, it was fun. i actually got dressed up and put on makeup. i even fixed my hair... although after an hour of dancing, you would have never known it. in fact, this is the only picture where i don't look a hot, sweaty, mess. aren't we cute though?
i also met some interesting people. we stayed at a friend of shantay's, who she had met through mututal friends. he plays basketball, and introduced us to several of his teammates, one of whom was from atlanta! small world, huh? we chatted about georgia... and missing georgia... for a minute. overall, it made for a very pleasant evening. OH. and we went to starbucks the next morning. bulgaria is moving up in the world! well... sofia is anyway.

other than that there is not much to report. i finalized my plans for turkey today. that is, i made the reservation for the hotel. now i simply have to obtain my bus ticket, which shouldn't be hard to do. i'm really excited about the trip. 1) because istanbul just sounds so exotic, and it has so much to offer in the way of cultural sites, and 2) because i'm going with amanda and shantay! my two favorite people.

i'm also looking into spending some time in australia... but more on that later.

i will take one second to vent though. the obama hype makes me throw up in my mouth a little. (sorry liberal friends! still love ya'll). and i just laughed and laughed when they fumbled through the OATH OF OFFICE. and honestly, it's not a big deal to me. he's human of course. i just thought about what type of cross they would have picked out to nail george bush to if that had been him. oh well, i suppose i should get used to it. i can't be one of those annoying people who is bitter for the next four years.

xo!

just another day in the life

so last night at approximately 11:15 pm, my electricity suddenly went out. now this has happened several times before, the longest stretch lasting about a half hour. i was annoyed, but not concerned. i waited it out. and waited... and waited... until, finally an hour later i realized that it wasn't coming back on. i went on my porch and saw lights from the apartments of other people on my floor. hmm.... i immediately went to the fuse box. i'd never really paid attention to it before and was surprised to see that it looked strikingly similar to an american-style fuse box. not the scary ones that peace corps showed us pictures of during training and strictly forbade us to touch (complete with hazard warnings of possible electrocution). however, because of the administration was SO adamant about not trying to do it yourself, i must admit that i was too timid to just try and "flip the switch," like you do back home.

and so i nearly froze to death. no heat. and even worse... no hot water for the next day should it not be fixed in time for school!

the next morning, the power was still not on and i was convinced that it was a fuse. i called my counterpart, who in turn called my assistant director, who then called the tech guy for the school. long story long... he came over and just as i thought, explained to me that my fuse box was "automatic," and i simply needed to turn the switch back on. *sigh. i guess it's better to be safe than sorry, but i like to do things on my own, and (believe it or not) i actually really like to do construction-type things. oh, and did i mention it's freezing??!! sometimes i ponder why on earth i decided to leave my sunny, never ever below freezing, georgia bubble.

as per usual, i got ready for class and proceeded to walk to school. it was SO slippery today. i mean, ridiculous. it's a wonder i haven't fallen and broken a hip. although, i'm more concerned about making a fool of myself in front of the students i can't stand... thereby giving them more ammo with which to torture me. on my way to class, i saw half of the 9th grade students from my next period walking home. the students and i both stopped upon reaching each other, and it seemed as though we were all a little confused. so i asked, "did i miss something? do we have class?" one of the girls replied, that yes.. they did have class, but it finished about 10 minutes ago. apparently, the classes were only 30 minutes today instead of 40 because of the ice. i'm thinking they wanted to give the kids a chance to walk home before it got dark.

now, rewind. remember how i mentioned earlier in the blog that i talked to both my counterpart and my assistant director? i guess neither one of them thought to tell me about the schedule changes. sooooo typical. it's not like i had anything extraordinary planned for the class. and even if i did, i could just use it next week. it's the fact that no one ever tells me anything. EVER! it just makes me look bad. irresponsible and incompetant. i don't like it.

but, it's not the first time it's happened. and certainly not the last. no worries -- two weeks till istanbul!

ps. i put up a link to my london pictures (on the right-hand side) for anyone who reads this and doesn't have a facebook or myspace account... although now that both my mom and step-mom have pages, i don't even know if that applies to anyone? maybe elvis. my parents' dog.